Posted on by Kristina Knowles

The one that got away…

Thanks be to God!

I know society talks about this person in television shows, movies and talk shows. The infamous “person that got away”, I am here to explain to you why this person doesn’t truly exist. We can waste a lot of time pining away for this person with questions or statements. Why didn’t I do better? Where did I go wrong? Why couldn’t they change? What if I said this? Waste. Of. Time.

I read the bible for thousands of reason, this would be one of them.  We live in a world that requires us to believe in man more often than we should believe in God. Healthy and well meaning relationships are important and necessary to strive in this world, we need them. The most important relationship we create is the one we establish with God.

After we develop our relationship with God, the next relationship we create is the love for ourselves. I see so much self hate, it’s terrible. People would rather ruin their lives with medication, drugs, fantasy, alcohol and jealousy. Instead of loving themselves, accepting themselves as God created them.

When we are in right relationship with God and ourselves we tend to attract the good people of our lives. And even if we don’t, a few bad seeds might slip in from time to time. Just know in your heart that God gave you an internal hard drive that allows you to know the difference. It’s up to you to listen or ignore the truth.

So let go and let God be the ruler of your life. Let go of ” the person who got away” and don’t look back at the “what if’s” of life. Just realize at this very moment you have the opportunity to change everything that is wrong about your life, especially the relationships. Learn from these past relationships, learn what you loved and what you hated. Don’t look back, its just a waste of time…

God bless “the one who got away”!

 

Posted on by Kristina Knowles

The night I went to jail…

To minister to an Inmate.

I was so confused to why this person was in jail after receiving a phone call one morning. So, I wanted to make sure what I was allowed to bring(bible) and wear. I contacted the Chaplain of the jail before my visit just to be prepared.

When I arrived to the jail, I was in a line of Attorneys, friends and family members. The welcome/waiting center of the jail was cold and unwelcoming. I checked in with my drivers license and gave the inmates first, middle and last name. Easy enough, right!? Not so fast, I was instantly denied access because I arrived on the wrong visiting evening. But wait, I had just talked to the Chaplain of the Jail who told me to arrive tonight at this time.

Once I told the woman about my dealings with the Chaplain, she acted as if she didn’t care. So I asked to speak to her Supervisor, famous last words. Then this big, tall, burly Officer appears and takes me to the side. I told him that I spoke with the Chaplain, the Chaplain told me to arrive tonight at this time, so this why I am here. He listened and had this real big ego and fake smile to go along with his big persona. The Officer proceeded to tell me that he was sorry that I was misinformed but I wasn’t going to be able to meet with this inmate under no circumstances.

I couldn’t believe it, I had cancelled my own bible study, I got my information from the Chaplain and I waited in line patiently with everyone. I then looked into his eyes and said very kindly, “May I speak to your Supervisor, please?” Then he lost it, he started to say,”Oh you want to talk to MY Supervisor, YOU want to talk to MY Supervisor?” This man turned bright red and no one watching flinched, I sat there in shock that he was acting so unprofessional and inappropriate for a Jail Guard. Then he walked away to make a call to his Supervisor.

As I sat and waited for the next Supervisor, the original Jail Guard came up to my face and stated I would not be getting in tonight. He was so mad and upset with me,  but before he slammed the door as he left I said,”God bless you.” He yelled back to me,”God bless you!” He was still so mad and angry, I couldn’t believe my eyes and what I experiencing?

Then to my surprise, I was greeted by a different, more professional Supervisor and he brought another guard with him; a female. I ,now, was telling my story for the 3rd time. I even played the message from the Chaplain of the jail from my cell phone. The Supervisor listened to me, heard the cell phone message and then looked at his colleague. At this point, I had no idea what was going to happen. Then he looked at me and said,”We are going to let you in tonight.” I instantly thanked him and God.

I was amazed how good God was to me that night, I held steadfast to my convictions. Satan didn’t want me to come into the jail and minister to that inmate but God did and that was beautiful. Whatever is right, holy or just is that of God and that is how we should live, everyday.

God is everywhere, Satan is not but unfortunately Satan leaves this stain on some of our lives if we let him. I see the stain on so many people’s lives, it’s disheartening. However, God sent His only Son to remove the sins or stains of our past. A stain is this lingering mark that doesn’t seem to disappear not matter how hard you try to remove it but that only comes from your lack of faith in God. God is the ultimate stain remover, just have faith.

Posted on by Kristina Knowles

A man from Chicago…

and I had a conversation about food.

He was in town for a wedding and we were talking about all the delicious desserts he is tempted to eat. He then proceeded to tell me that he weighed an extra 180 more pounds a year ago before he had gastric bypass surgery. My mouth dropped because he seemed naturally thin vs. previously obese. I told him how proud I was of him for all his hard word work and gave him a high five.

I then leveled with him about how hard it is to eat healthy every day with all the choices we have these days. We can have bad choices delivered to our front door, we can drive thru fast food restaurants and buy super unhealthy food choices at the grocery store. And television doesn’t help either, every other commercial is about unhealthy food as well. How do we compete with those odds? I will tell you.

We make our bodies a temple in which God created us to protect and nourish. We make an effort everyday to make good healthy choices to make our bodies strong, healthy and pure. We teach others and our children to make good wholesome choices as well. God doesn’t intend for us to live in pain, or be in a body that we are not going to take care of.

The gentleman told me that he could polish off a Chicago style pizza with all the toppings all by himself, every weekend. I asked him if he felt like he was in a constant food coma most of his life until now, he agreed. I have seen this behavior in many people’s lives, we develop habits that our life style condones. We surround ourselves with people that eat, live and sleep like us for the most part. So if you want to change your lifestyle with how you eat, live or sleep make an effort to make changes that encourage a healthy life. Lack of sleep and poor eating habits rob us from energy, overall health and happiness.

Daniel knew King Nebuchadnezzar’s food and wine was not healthy to eat. God gave Daniel the knowledge to discern healthy decisions vs. unhealthy choices. Just so you know, God gave us discernment too, we just have to decide to use it and not ignore it.

Posted on by Kristina Knowles

The 5k…

That made me incredibly happy.

I started a tradition of running in The Susan B. Komen 5k Race for a Cure in Memory of Grandma Mary Miles. My Grandma was my rock and soul. I miss the way she loved me and cared for me but I also appreciated the time we had together.

My Son had grown up watching me train and run the race, he was so proud of me. In 2004, Griffin says to me at the last minute, “Mama, I am running with you.” I instantly tell Griffin,”No honey, stay with Papa and I will be done very soon.” Griffin insisted that he too wanted to race in Memory of Grandma Miles, he pleaded with me.

I gave in, and we ran the race, side by side. There were times when Griffin wanted to quit and give in because he didn’t realize the commitment he made. His heart was in a good place for a 7 year old but he never ran a 5k before. I felt so much pride and love for my role as Mother. Sometimes we are so in the “Mom Mode” teaching and correcting that we don’t realize the positive impact we make on our children until we see them do things that make us proud.

Griffin and I finished the race together, with great big smiles on our faces and tears of joy in my eyes. I told Griffin to look behind him at the finish line, to see the 1000’s of people behind him. Griffin was amazed and pretty proud of himself.

Remember that God knows our limitations and struggles but He is always supporting us no matter what. And we need to support our children for the good of God’s kingdom, no matter what. Sometimes it’s hard to teach and convince our children the trials of life. Sometimes we refuse to let God convince and teach us His plan for our life. Be open to the goodness of God, His plans are far better than our plans for ourselves.

 

Posted on by Kristina Knowles

Sitting with a Veteran…

I struck up a conversation with a very kind hearted man. This man was waiting for his wife, daughter and grand-daughter.

I thanked him for his service and started to talk to him about my son who recently graduated from The United States Air Force. He started to beam with joy to hear the story and look at the pictures from the graduation. It was hot and I wanted to get a cup of water, as I got up I asked him if he needed anything, he responded; just more time.

My heart sank, I never heard anyone ask for time in such a humble manner. When I came back, I asked him about time. He said, Oh Kristina, I am on the other side of my life, the side that is almost over. I have a beautiful wife, an amazing daughter and such a spectacular grand daughter, my time with them is growing shorter and shorter every day.

We don’t know how much time we have with each other he replied but I do know one thing, I don’t want to waste my time with them arguing, fighting or complaining. I want to have happy filled moments with them. I want smiles and not frowns, tears of joy instead of tears of pain. I started to cry just a little bit to hear this man, who fought in Vietnam, who loves his family and just wanted the peace of love to over rule his last remaining moments.

Do you think about the time you wasted on someone that didn’t care about you? Or all the wasted time you sat in front of a video game or television? Maybe time at a job that didn’t amount to anything? We waste hours upon hours of time on things that don’t really matter, until we are faced with the grim reality of time running out. I ask you to stop wasting time at this very moment on the things in your life that are wasting your time.

God waits patiently for all of His children to wake up but wouldn’t you rather wake up now before it’s too late?!

Posted on by Kristina Knowles

Happy vs. Holy..

Which one is more important to you?

I recently met a couple, they told me that they have been married to each other for 28 years. Wow, I exclaimed and congratulated them both. I was intrigued to know how were they defying the odds and avoiding divorce.

The gentleman, quickly responded,”I married up” for sure. We all laughed but then his wife responded. “It’s not about finding someone who makes you happy but someone who makes you Holy.” I responded with a firm, Amen and added when you are holy, it is when you are truly happy. We were all smiling, shaking our heads in agreement.

Then I started to think of every relationship I ever had in my entire life. Romantic, platonic, family, friendly, work, neighbors, college, high school and elementary, all of them. Which one’s were leading me to be holy and which ones were not, the list was short but instantly I was able to identify each and every person who wanted to do good in my life for God.

I love this concept, help and lead people new and old to be more holy, which will lead to true happiness. Great concept but are people in general ready to be happy on God’s terms or are they striving to solely be happy on their own? I truly believe this is the #1 hang up in most people’s lives. Let go and let God I like to say when someone is so stuck they can’t see straight. However, easier said than done for most.

I will choose God for the source of my holiness which will undeniably lead me to happiness. My happiness from holiness will lead to the happiness and holiness for others. I pray for you today, choose God’s plan for your life above your own. I promise, it’s even better than you could have ever imagined for yourself.

 

Posted on by Kristina Knowles

My Four Fathers…

And how I love them so.

I was born to a Mother and Father, then after 11 years of marriage they decided to part ways and divorce. And you would think that is where the story ended but no that is where the blessings began.

I have Four remarkable Fathers who have made an impact on my life. I know, I know, some people can’t even say they have 1 father and I have been blessed with four men who I get to call Dad. I took the sour lemons of life and made delicious green tea lemonade and stayed blessed.

One day while I was thinking about my 4 Fathers I started to write their names down in order in which they came into my life.

A is for Andrew, my Dad who gave me life. My Dad is a tough guy but a kind heart. He taught me to be strong, fierce, kind and graceful. My Dad told me to never let anyone tell me I couldn’t do something good, to never back down and to never give up. We were active with bike riding, cooking and sports galore. My Dad didn’t drink or do drugs and he advocated the same principles for me; I obliged. I love roses because my Dad made sure I had roses for birthdays and Valentine’s day. My Dad wanted us to have manners and respect so he would take us to fine dining restaurants, so we could practice what he taught us. And to this day, my Dad may disagree with my politics but he loves me and appreciates me for who I am and I love him.

R is for Robert, my Dad who came in after the divorce. The very tall, kind, quiet and caring Dad; a gentle giant if you will. He like my Dad, taught me grace which every little girl should be taught. Robert is a very patient man, he had no children of his own before our brother Jacob came along. With Robert, I learned about a beautiful Jewish family and religion first hand. He included us in all his family activities and traditions without batting an eye. Robert gave me a different perspective on family values. He encouraged me, helped me start baby-sitting and would even drive me and my friends to the mall when other parents couldn’t. And to this day, Robert is still my Dad and I love him so much.

M is for Michael, my other Dad who came in after the divorce from Robert. Unfortunately, I didn’t bond with Michael but that doesn’t mean I didn’t learn something from him while he was in the position of Dad. Michael was a Southern Baptist from Alabama who was extremely set in his ways with no prior children of his own. And I will leave it right there…

S is for Steve, my current Dad after a huge gap of time after Michael. Steve is quiet, generous, patient and kind. Oh yeah, super smart and will beat you at trivia. Steve is a singer, loves a good pipe, a stiff drink and his dogs. I have been a single Mom for the last 11 years, without the help, kindness and care from Steve and my Mom I don’t know how my life would be. I am grateful that Steve loves my Mom so much, again with no children of his own he has shown so much care and kindness. And I love Steve, too.

So as you can see, God blessed me with 4 unbelievable Fathers. The A.R.M.S. of each Father surrounded me with kindness, care, concern and love in their own special way, even Michael. God knew I needed each Father for a different reason that would help mold me into the women I am today. My life could be so different but God made it so wonderful.

Happy Father’s Day to all the Dad’s who showed up to be a great force in their children’s lives. I appreciate the Dad’s who won’t give up during the tough times of life. And lastly, God bless the Dad’s who stepped in when someone else stepped out. Thank you!

(*I am not an Advocate of Divorce, I don’t recommend multiple marriages. However, I know without a doubt through all the trials and tribulations of my life Jesus was right there beside me, showing up, loving me and protecting me. Just like He is today for you and me.)